Aunty Ngozi solves your problems

My Name is Ngozi, and my job is to reply to your agony letters. You have to be really crazy to take my advice, but hey, who am I to judge?
If you want my help, send me an email today:
auntyngozi@wazobiareport.com, but first make sure you understand what I'm about.
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Love always,
Aunty Ngozi

What does one do with a stingy boyfriend?
 

Dear Aunty Ngozi,


Please what does one do with a stingy boyfriend?  


Apart from his 'aka aradite' this man is very nice and handsome and all those other things but the stinginess is in a class of its own.  Hmmm, one time he bought me an £80 pair of shoes and I thought he had been cured, next thing he borrowed £75 from me that I haven’t seen till today.


That was September last year.


My sister said I should drop him like he's hot, but I am still hoping he can be saved, and that you can tell me how to cure his problem. I will follow your advice to the letter, pls help me!


Titi


 


My reply

Titi,


Find any old £5 note and give it to him. Blessed are those who breakeven; they shall never be labeled gold-digger.


Aunty Ngozi


P.S: It use to make my body boil when girls fall my hand like this. You mean in this time and age you are still waiting for man to buy you shoes? Shoo? As in? And you are listening to your sister telling you to drop handsome man in this time of scarcity? Look ehn, ‘generous’ men are plenty and easy to find: They full ground for Abuja - if you think the receiver if stolen money is not as guilty as the politician who stole the money, but handsome men are in very limited supply; they are a scare commodity! If you like don’t go and make your own money and be waiting for one male child to be using kobo kobo to oppress himself. £75 shoes! You even fall your hand for revealing that piece of information: your taste must be dodgy for £75 shoes to be exciting you! Is it from Primax or TK Maxx?  Don’t make me vex this afternoon o! Shio! Ish. Nonsense. I have even vexed! 

 




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