Abuja - The story so far:
The Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC) questioned the Chairman of the House’s Adhoc Committee on Petroleum Subsidy, Hon. Farouk Lawan, over bribery allegation involving $600,000.
A video recording purportedly showing the bride money exchanging hands is in the possession of the EFCC.
Hon. Lawan has since denied being the one captured in the clip, collecting marked dollar bills.
Speaker of the House, Hon. Aminu Tambuwal and other lawmakers have disowned Lawan over his selfishness in not sharing out the money collected as is customary.
Actors in the drama:
Mr Femi Otedola of Zenon oil has claimed responsibility for the sting operation which led to the video recording.
Mr Otedola, too stingy to pay a bribe, invited the SSS to monitor his discussions with Hon. Farouk.
Otedola also cleverly (stingily?) got the security agency to provide the marked dollars allegedly paid to Lawan and one Boniface.
A former head of state is said to have handed the tape to the house of reps after viewing it and discovering it wasn’t the Indian Movie Otedola promised him. This infuriated him much.
Latest developments:
Bowing to immense pressures to clear his name, Hon. Lawan has now revealed a dark family secret, namely, that a dark sheep exists in the family in the person of none other than the honorable’s own identical twin brother.
This revelation, which was understandably heart wrenching for the lawmaker to disclose, fully exonerates Lawan from collecting the bribe as it was his twin, Loki, impersonating Lawan, who demanded and collected the bribe and was subsequently filmed by SSS agents.
In a press statement released by the family, spokesperson for the honorable member said:
“We can see how he (Loki) could have deceived everybody including the SSS. Both he and our son, Lawan, are very difficult to tell apart and only we family members can differentiate them.
“We implore the public to please leave us alone during this trying period as we deal with the disgrace that this bad egg has once again brought upon us.”
It was further disclosed that the mischievous twin has since gone into hiding as he often does and may never be found until he decides to surface again.
Oil Companies Chiefs are said to have funded the SSS/EFCC joint operation as part of social-corporate responsibility initiatives.
- Don Crapper.